Patton Oswalt to William & Mary’s Graduating Class: “You Poor Bastards,” “You Do Not Have a Choice But to Be Anything But Extraordinary”

There’s nev­er been an eas­i­er time in his­to­ry to be “extra­or­di­nary “.

You must be very proud of your­self. You hide behind a key­board and have the audac­i­ty to call an invi­tee speak­er worth­less. Brave. The pow­er you think you pos­sess! You must imag­ine YOU are above some­how. And yet you haven’t been asked to speak!

Just anoth­er clown. Hard-work­ing, decent peo­ple who still remem­ber the dif­fer­ence between right and wrong, do not agree with hard­ly any­thing you say.

…think it’s called “Google Feed” or some such. Thanks again!!

Every­thing you said her gen­er­a­tion does was cre­at­ed by pre­vi­ous gen­er­a­tions, not hers.

Mine also accept­ed respon­si­bil­i­ty for mis­takes, her’s blames every­one else!

Unclench dude…….

He’s right though, a 2.8 gpa , he is a moron!

Wow all you alt right trolls cling­ing to the wors­en­ing fas­cist dystopia you cre­at­ed with that hor­ri­ble excuse for a fake pres­i­dent drumpf.

You do know that pulling your­self up by your boot­straps was meant as a deroga­to­ry state­ment right? Oh wait half of you can’t read so what’s the point of me explain­ing it. Adding insult to injury is the fact he does­n’t care about any of you because you are too poor to be any part of his mas­ter plan to enrich him­self and his cronies.

I always get a chuck­le when I hear all you mag­a­tards whine about antifa like they are the bad peo­ple. Let’s just pre­tend you trai­tors did not try to take over the coun­try after a failed vote by tiny hands drumpf. If minori­ties tried the same thing they would have been shot or arrest­ed for trea­son, and sum­mar­i­ly exe­cut­ed after a sham tri­al. But hey white priv­i­lege isn’t a thing.

Solar bad, oil good! CO2 keeps us warm! Trick­le down eco­nom­ics works because bil­lion­aires know best. 150 years till the plan­et dies? I won’t be around that long so who cares amiright?

NobOdY wAnTs tO wORk! Ya no thanks to crap and stag­nant wages. I don’t want 10 room­mates in a house owned by a hedge fund with 15% rate increas­es every year. It’s fun­ny because all you trail­er park mag­a­tards pay the very peo­ple you put in office to exploit you. All it took for them to steal your free­dom was a scape­goat that they invent­ed. Oh wait I keep for­get­ting you guys are not edu­cat­ed enough to read a book that does­n’t have pic­tures in it.

You wan­na know why we have ille­gal immi­gra­tion? Because we need ille­gal labor to sus­tain our food pro­duc­tion. We will nev­er have a path to legal work­ers because then they get rights and can’t be exploit­ed. Your idiot com­man­der in queef wants you angry so you won’t notice that he is the one steal­ing your jobs and your tax­es. God knows you won’t pick straw­ber­ries for $1 a bushel. You would rather be wel­fare kings and queens and then blame immi­grants for steal­ing jobs you know you would nev­er do in the first place. Oh and here is the kick­er, repub­li­cans stole your jobs with NAFTA (signed by Bush).

It’s hilar­i­ous that you keep vot­ing in the very peo­ple that keep steal­ing from you every elec­tion cycle. And you hap­pi­ly accept your own exploita­tion in exchange for some made up cri­sis against *insert minor­i­ty of choice here*.

Your gen­er­a­tion has done and con­tin­ues to do incal­cu­la­ble dam­age to the only home we all have, but we are the prob­lem some­how for point­ing it out.

I don’t want to do that kind of labor for sure. But that’s the whole point though.

I’m guess­ing you are also a vic­tim of the Amer­i­can edu­ca­tion sys­tem since you think our cur­rent pres­i­dent is a vic­to­ry. Ram­pant infla­tion (repub­li­cans did that), low pay (repub­li­cans sys­tem­at­i­cal­ly destroy labor pro­tec­tions), absurd stu­dent loan cir­cus (repub­li­cans can steal PPP mon­ey and get it wiped away no prob­lem though), the trav­es­ty of roe v wade get­ting repealed (repub­li­tards strike again), clarence thomas (guess who), tay­lor greene, boe­bert, kennedy, desan­tis, rand paul, mcconnell. Yes I’m real hap­py for more inept polit­i­cal grid­lock while crony cap­i­tal­ism drains our nation. At least the US and Mex­i­co have one thing in com­mon… Cor­rup­tion is alive and well. The old PRI par­ty del­e­gates from Mex­i­co wish they could have got­ten away with what is hap­pen­ing in the home of the brave.

I’m sure our found­ing fathers total­ly want­ed us to recre­ate the very con­di­tions that we are now liv­ing in that they them­selves sailed across the sea to escape. They were no saints either, but believe me when I say slav­ery is alive and well. They just put a neat lit­tle fla­vor­ing on it called non infla­tion adjust­ed min­i­mum wage. You think home prices sky rock­et­ing is a coin­ci­dence? Nope they want to bury you in inescapable debt so they can con­tin­ue fleec­ing you with rent, high inter­est debt, and every com­mod­i­ty the aver­age sheep in Amer­i­ca needs to live their seden­tary lifestyle. But you idiots hap­pi­ly eat from the trough because you don’t know or care about the con­se­quences of inac­tion.

We are most def­i­nite­ly taxed with­out rep­re­sen­ta­tion since those clowns don’t give a fly­ing fid­dle about their actu­al con­stituents. If they had to get patch­es for every cor­po­rate donor they took mon­ey from, Nascar would be jeal­ous.

Don’t tread on me became please tread on me, but tell me who to hate.

In the infa­mous words of drumpf “SAD!”

Do you mean just like how Lib­er­al Insti­tu­tions of High­er Learn­ing shut down Con­ser­v­a­tive speak­ers? A recent event at the Uni­ver­si­ty of Pitts­burg comes to mind.

A C lev­el celebri­ty…
.…at a B lev­el col­lege…
…deliv­er­ing a D lev­el speech.

Bril­liant take on Oswald’s speech.
I hope you make up with who­ev­er peed in your Chee­rios.

So Repub­li­can of you to assume I don’t have assets,friends, or went to school on my own dime.

I’d love to see your “research”. Throw­ing your own under the bus too? You are all over the place. Elon can go die in a fire for all I care.

Maybe ask any res­i­dent of the mar­shall island about cli­mate change? How about the head of the UN? Oh wait, I for­got you guys don’t read actu­al news

Did you receive a PPP loan that you embez­zled? Con­gress sure took advan­tage.

Anoth­er valid ques­tion, does your daugh­ter speak to you or did she aban­don you like a used tam­pon for your quacky views?

Also please address my “dia­tribe” word for word. I’d hon­est­ly love that. From my expe­ri­ence all you repub­li­tards just par­rot fox news snip­pets and wor­ship ben shapiro or rush lim­baugh may be rest in hell.

How’s Flori­da doing with their legal migrant labor? Oranges rot­ting on the branch?