Survival Guide to the Post Apocalypse (A Little NSFW)

What to do after the Apocalypse? This little public information film was made (wink, wink) by the “Australian Board of Civil Defence” during the early 1980s. Found somewhere in an old university archive, the film, now newly dusted off, is being shown for the first time. Note: It’s a tad unsafe for work…


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  1. Ramjett says . . . | February 6, 2011 / 6:07 pm

    Funny how the credits say “2009”

  2. Richard says . . . | February 18, 2011 / 10:26 am

    @Ramjett: Yes, intentionally funny. That’s why the blurb says “made (wink, wink) . . . during the early 1980s.” As in, not really made in the 1980s. The initial 1981 copyright, appearance of dirt and hair in the “playback” and audio artifacts are all part of the joke.

  3. Smitty says . . . | March 9, 2011 / 9:22 am

    How many REAL survival experts talk about stocking up on ANYTHING(gold, food, etc.)? Having an excess of anything, in a real economic collapse, makes you a bigger target for those around you. All of these so-called “experts” that are peddling gold, silver, seeds, food are making tons of money based on your fear. In a situation where there is no electricity, no law, no accountability, there is only ONE thing of value…YOUR own survival skills. Think you can stay where you are and defend your stuff? You can’t stay awake 24 hours a day; and you won’t have enough ammo. In survival, it’s not how much “stuff” you have…it’s about what you can defend. And it’s about how much you can carry. All of this crap about stocking up on supplies and gold is giving you a false sense of security. How long do you think you can last before terrified and hungry people start coming to take your stuff? A week? A month? Even if you live out in the country. How long will it be before thousands of hungry people start leaving the city and roaming the country side looking for shelter and food?

    If you think that “survival” means that you’re to have a house in the country with plenty of food, gold, and a solar generator…ask Randy Weaver or David Koresh how well it worked out for them. All they dealt with was a few hundred coordinated people with rifles. Change those situations to hundreds (then thousands) of hungry people and then think if you have the man-power to guard a perimeter 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

    Here’s some REAL survival advice. And it’s completely free. Learn the survival techniques taught to the military (ie Army Infantry, Rangers, SF, Marine Corps, Navy SEALs, etc.). Watch shows by Les Stroud and Bear Grylls. Read books or websites that teach personal survival. Learn the principals of the Light Infantry (ie staying off roads, avoiding populated areas, getting to and staying in the wood line). Understand that survival is NOT about how much stuff you have to defend, but about how much stuff you can carry. Understand that survival from thousands (or millions) of hungry people will require you to be nomadic.

    Change your thinking about survival. Instead of thinking “how much food do I have?” Think “what can I carry in a ruck sack that will aid me in getting food in the woods”? Instead of thinking “how much water do I have?” Think “what can I carry in a ruck sack that will aid me in drinking clean water that I find?” Instead of thinking “I need to maintain shelter from the elements.” Think “what can I carry in a ruck sack that will keep me dry and give me shelter?” Instead of thinking “how many boxes of ammo can I stock?” Think “how much ammo can I carry”?

    What about medical supplies? A standard “first aid” kit has a bunch of stuff that you won’t need in it. Plus, which first aid kit should you get? The big one? The really big one? Which one is best? Do a little research to find out the absolute essentials needed in a survival first aid kit. Taking a Red Cross standard first aid class is worth a lot more than gold.

    In reality, prepare to go mobile. Prepare as if you will need to go on foot. Plan the quickest (and safest) routes from your front door to the woods. Plan at least three routes that lead OUT of town. This means you AND your family. Everyone on foot, quietly, expediently, and smartly. Avoiding any authorities (if any still exist at that point) and contact with other people. Survive on your own or with your immediate family.

    Now if, at some time in the future, you stumble across a well organized community of people (provided their perimeter security personnel don’t shoot you out of fear)…then maybe they’ll take you in. But if you don’t have any relevant skills to add to their community then they most likely won’t let you in. So you’ll have to be self sustaining until you come across a large enough community that can afford to be more accepting. But don’t count finding such a community.

    People say “prepare for the worst but hope for the best”. Well I just told you how to truly prepare for the worst. And it didn’t cost you a dime.

    Understand this…even if you’re a super, uber, combat ready, “Rambo” type…the challenge of safely navigating the “Escape from New York” scenario of making it from the city to the woods will require huge amounts of dumb luck. It may take several hours to several days just to get out of the city. Staying off the radar of hungry and desperate people will be very difficult. Then IF you do make it to the woods, the day to day challenges of executing your independent survival skills will set in. So if you’re going to “prepare for the worst” then PREPARE FOR THE WORST. Decide, right now, if you want to live; if you want to survive. Decide if you are willing to prepare your family for “the worst”.

    Do I think it’s worth it? Yes, I do. It may take months or years of living in the woods as a nomadic survivor. But there is always the hope that things will get better.

    Who am I? I was a Light Infantry Soldier that had the opportunity to get some of the best survival training that is available; also served in Iraq for a year. I was also an EMT/Paramedic for 8 years.

    If you have any doubt as to whether or not the survival information that I have provided for you is correct or not…don’t ask the peddlers of gold, seeds, or solar generators. Ask an Army or Marine Corps Infantry Soldier, an Army Ranger, Army SF Soldier, Marine Corps Force Recon, Navy SEAL, Air Force Combat Controller, or Air Force Para-rescue. They’ll all tell you the same thing.

    Never, in any of my survival training, did words like “portfolio”, “currency”, “gardening”, or “solar generators” ever come up. At best, all of those things MIGHT buy you a little time; that’s all. My experiences in three third-world countries (two in the Middle East, one in Central America) clearly showed me how people with unchecked lawlessness will behave. It also showed me some of the things that I will do in order to survive. NOBODY can maintain their code of ethics when they are hungry, their children are hungry, and there’s no one around to help. You think rioting and looting, here in the states, is bad when the lights go out for a few hours? Try a few days, or a few weeks, or a few months.

    The ONLY reason the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina went so well (by comparison) is because New Orleans was surrounded by the rest of Louisiana and the United States which had not lost its economy/electricity. 99% of America was still intact and able to bring in aid (late as it may have been). Same goes for New York City on September 11th, 2001. But what if all of North America is without an economy and/or electricity? Who would rescue you then?

    There is one exception to what I am saying about survival. There is ONE way that a person (and family) can “hunker down”. But you’d have to be invisible to everyone else. People that have those pre-built survival bunkers installed (out in the country) underground stand a good chance of staying in place (for a much longer time) because those bunkers are well hidden. When marauders come (and they WILL COME!), if they don’t know you’re there then they will pass you by. But, eventually, you’d have to come out. If you carefully/methodically/consistently recon your immediate area then you could probably stay there for a while. But if people see you opening that hatch and coming out of your bunker…it’s over. The whole reason for having such a bunker is its invisibility.

    The fear of not knowing how to prepare for the worst is what keeps you up at night. But after you learn how to condense everything you need into a ruck sack, and then learn what to do…you won’t worry about it anymore. And it’s so much easier than trying to anticipate the actions of others (ie government, law enforcement, economy). By focusing solely on what YOU plan to do, and eliminating what others MIGHT do, you can empower yourself and go on with life as usual. And should the worst happen? You’ll truly be prepared.

  4. brian says . . . | August 30, 2011 / 6:51 pm

    smitty, you said the same thing on the supply list. I support our troops, but calm down and don`t copy paste!

  5. Kyo says . . . | April 26, 2012 / 8:00 am

    Smitty.. cool novel bro.

  6. Art-o-ficial says . . . | April 26, 2012 / 7:18 pm

    Smitty, that was really good, i can’t believe I read all of that, but you are right. Worry about numero UNO and the rest of the world can be dealt with later.

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